Shit in your hair.

The demo sounds of Against Me!'s song "Shit Stroll" from their demo Vivada Vis rings in my ear as I humbly write this.

I had a panic attack last night, my first one in quite some time. I was at the cakewalk in our town when it happened. I was walking with Fro and Sam through the immense crowd of people. Crowds don't scare me, I like people. I like showcasing my assery whenever I get the chance, really... but when it's a crowd of people I know I feel different.

I freeze. I freak out. I start having trouble breathing. My breathing halts and white spots begin to appear in front of me. I lose my balance a bit, but nothing that anyone would notice. I curse indefinitely about how much "I fucking hate these people" before I retaliate away from the mental battle I conjure. I feel them staring even though I know they could give a fuck less about me and what I'm doing. I feel judged by complete strangers who I attempt to ignore. I give in.

Trick-Or-Treat: Costumes

Trick-or-Treat was always something I dug as a kid, but then again.... almost every kid does too. For some reason our stupid fucking town gives these kids from five pm til' six-thirty pm to Trick-or-Treat. What the fuck? When I was a little kid it was from five pm til the creepy guy down the block starts offering you ice-cream and teddybears if you come inside for a few.

Is it the economy? Is it the perverts? Is it some religious thing? I don't know, but how did shit change this much in the mere seven years since I donned some type of costume and said the magic words that would provide you with diabetes and lack of sleep that evening.

I saw a few cool costumes, but just as many lame and un-original ones. There was this little girl who had a cardboard box around her with little puppies kind of stuck next to her in the box and on the front of the box it read in large, black letters "Free Puppies". Another kid was dressed up as the Holy Bible and he was handing out bible tracts.

For the most part there was just lame scream-masks and people with black face robes on. Pretty unoriginal shit. No zombies, no gory policemen (saw one regular kid dressed as a cop, I wanted to punch him in his prepubescent dick), it was basically blah with the exception of about ten to fifteen kids who looked cool and had some rad costumes.

Some more interesting things happened that day/night/evening, but this post was specific!!!

- Josh.

Geek.

Some of you may have seen that my blog occasionally reflects things of a geekish or nerdish nature, well- it's because I'm a nerd. Genuinely.

I'm beyond nerd at this point, really. I don't play WoW anymore (I played for a while though,, when I lived in AZ. Undead Rogue FTW!), so I'm a nerd with downtime... a very dangerous thing.


I think you should be proud of who you are, not in a "White Pride- seig heil" sense, but an embracing sense that you don't deny who you are just because you think that it's lame or people would think differently of you.

Because it'd take too long to explain A LOT of the geeky shit I do, I figured I'd make a simple list (all nice things come in list forms. Breakup letters excluded):

1. I anticipated a translation an english translation patch for a GBA ROM. (It was Mother 3, which I beat a few days back. EPIC ending)


2. I've SEARCHED the internet for hours looking for that special copy of The Legend Of Zelda: A Link To The Past with the Chris Houlihan room that contained tons of rupees.


3. I constantly have my Google RSS feeder open in some window so I can read the newest updates from Wired.com and Filmschoolrejects.com, (an RSS feeder essentially makes it so you don't have to go straight to a website to see if they've updated stories and they just come to you. Kinda like someone sending you an e-mail of a newstory.



4. I listen to podcasts dedicated to video games and I have an RSS folder specifically FOR video game podcasts.


5. I pride myself on my saved episodes of The X-Files on my DvR.


6. I have Firebug extention on my Firefox so I can take and edit HTML to my liking.


7. I wrote my own symphony on Mario Paint (Not my video below, but a cool example of what Mario Paint was/is).



8. I've DOWNLOADED and LISTENED to an entire video game soundtrack... and liked it.


9. I've debated online about who shot first- Han or Greedo.



10. I've written a Final Fantasy 7 fanfic and felt bad about myself when it received poor reviews (no I'm not giving you that link. ever.)



I guess the point here is... be yourself. Many people here have read about my drunken escapades and bouts with various people of various authority positions... so why should you be afraid to let your geek flag fly.

Come on- be honest, we all got a LITTLE geek in us if we're reading this fucking blog.

- Josh.

What the fuck Tom Gabel?

Tom Gabel is a pioneer and a hero to many people who enjoy folk-punk and equally a traitor to just as many. Personally, I've always dug him and a lot of the tunes that his band "Against Me!" has churned out. His new solo EP "Heart Breaks" furthers himself even farther from his deep punk roots that he seemingly abandoned with the release of "Against Me!'s" newest record "New Wave" on Sire records of last year.

The first two tracks from his EP (Random Hearts and Conceptual Paths) anger me like no other. They sound like Shwayze, no fucking lie. There's an 808 drum machine over his acoustic guitar and this saddens me. Whatever happened to screaming your lungs out about how much Starbucks sucks?

What happened to the unintelligible lyrics and the soulful input that everyone could feel even through a CD that set them apart from everyone else? What happened to the songs that could cause a riot as well as cause everyone to break down and fall apart on the dancefloor?



As Tom's EP continues, it DOES get better... but it all sounds like Billy Bragg meets Against Me! not just Against Me!'s lead singer doing his solo shit. Anna is a Stoolpigeon is probably the best track on here and the live bootleg (obviously found online) is probably than this album version.

I'm still a huge fan of Tom Gabel as well as Against Me!, but it bothers me how much they've shifted. I even enjoy their record "New Wave" but I hardly view it as an Against Me! record when you compare it to anything from "Reinventing Axl Rose". I don't know maybe I'm just being nuts, so I'll ask you. Listen to both of these songs (In video form) and you tell me what YOU think.

1. We Laugh At Danger (And Break All The Rules) from "Reinventing Axl Rose"



2. Stop! from "New Wave"



Anyone else see what I mean? They don't even sound the same at all. It's almost exactly what Greenday did and they were fucking SHUNNED by their old fans. I'm still a fan of Against Me! and I will continue to be... but I just wanna hear something unintelligible for a while.

Any opinion on this matter?

Sunday Afternoon

3:42 on a Sunday afternoon.
The amount of hatred I feel for Sunday Afternoon's surpasses my hatred of shitty hip-hop and valley-girl-speak.

There is a complete lack of effort towards any Sunday, in my opinion.
The day is just fucking lame.
Everyone is bummed because they have work/school the following morning/evening and it's a day where most people just feel like laying around in the overly-enthralling boredom.

I question the validity and sanity of those fucking people who get up, go to Church and have a merry fucking day on a Sunday. It's just retarded. Fine, you believe in Jesus- would you like a cookie? No. No amount of Twin Peaks reruns can force me into a Church on a Sunday morning. I'd rather watch my grandmother undress and perform a burlesque show in front of me instead of attending Church.

I know it's not for everyone, but fuck that shit.
Fuck Sunday man, fuck Sunday.

- Josh.

Does The Nostalgia Actually Hold Up?

If you're a 90's kid (I'll spare you the list as well as the cliches) then you PROBABLY remember the great Nick show "Are You Afraid Of The Dark?", it is truly the pinnacle of Children's Television.


If you've never heard of OR seen the show, then you don't know what you're missing out on. It's easily a children's' version of Tales From The Crypt. It's essentially a show about a group of kids called "The Midnight Society" who go to a fire pit and tell ghost stories. There are quite a few well-known actors and actresses who appeared or got their start on the show. Some of these include Ryan Gosling, Neve Campbell, Elisha Cuthbert, Jay Baruchel and Gilbert Gottfried.

I remember sitting at my grandmothers old home (before it got knocked over by a tree) and watching SNICK when an ad for it came on. I was like three at time, so I was never awake to really watch it, but when I was five I recall watching it for the first time. The first episode I watched was about a boy who's brother died after a bridge collapse as they were riding bikes and the brother was a ghost who haunted him.

The show was terrifying as a youth and I question whether it'll be just as good today or if I'm holding onto some archaic nostalgia. It's like a horror movie when you're little and then you watch it when you get older... it usually doesn't hold up. I'm hoping that the show is just as good as I remember it, because it's starting to air again tonight on The N (or some affiliated show) at 8:00PM. I guess they're just gonna re-air the old episodes... so get your DvR's ready :)

Mother 3 = Epic

If you've never heard of the game "Earthbound" then this may mean very little to you. Earthbound was an console RPG released for the Super Nintendo in 1995 as a direct rehash/sequel of Mother 0, a game from Japan. The game is possibly one of the greatest console RPG's and should probably be considered socially significant.


The game was special because it was set in current time, not the future nor the past- how many RPG's were. Earthbound stood out in a world of Final Fantasy's, Seiken Denetsu's (Secret Of Mana's) and others. It had a happy nature about it. The characters felt real and amusing. They weren't overly-dramatic and the story wasn't dark as all hell, so even little kids could dig it.

One of the games creators stated in a interview that his main influence for creating the game was John Lennon. Knowing that Lennon is a primary influence for a video game about saving humanity went through my head many times after I read that interview.

Many gamers agree that Earthbound (or Mother 2 in Japan) is considered one of the classic console rpg's, it's made it's rank among some of the greatest games of all time and has sparked an INSANE fan-base across the world, Including tattoos.


While you can download a SNES emulator to play the game and the rom for it- it's still not as great as sitting in front of a TV at three in the morning and defeating Star Man Junior in the first 45 minutes.

Because of the renowned success of the game, a sequel was to be released for the Nintendo 64, but was eventually cancelled because they wanted to do things with the game that were too powerful for the 64, at the time.

In 2003 Mother 3 was announced for the Gameboy Advance... with no English port in the near future.



It was angering to hear that they weren't going to make an English port of it. I tried playing the Japanese rom after it came out... but I don't know Japanese... so I was fucked.

One day I came across the site mother3.fobby.net to find out that THEY were working on the English translation. Of course at that time they were just starting. They were only beginning hacking. This was... late 2007, if I recall correctly... but on the afternoon of October 18Th, 2008- the English patch was released.

It damn near made me orgasm where I sat when I loaded it up for the first time and saw everything in my native language. Earthbound was a game I fondly remember from my childhood, as fucked as that sounds. So when I now have the chance to play the long awaited sequel... it's a nice feeling.

Check out: http://mother3.fobby.net/

to find out how to play it.

(I'm aware that me posting this means that I will NEVER have sex with a female ever again.)

The Sounds Of Hymnal Voices

Good evening.
As I sit here, I listen to my music recommendations as given by the site Last.fm
Currently, it's given me the song "No Face" by the great ska group The Suicide Machines.

Lately, I've been writing a lot.
Meaning.... since my last real post, I've been writing.
Not blogs so to speak, but actual stories.
I'm really digging them too.
The ebb and flow of the stories are rather unique, in my opinion.

Only one person has read more than "Losing Your Mind and Benefiting From It All" and it'll probably stay that way until I actually feel confident enough to release them upon the world!

I've kind of been stuck in my room working on those writings.
I've only left when it was crucial that I shower and look semi-decent to make an appearance upon the world.

(Now playing: "Let's Face It" By The Mighty Mighty Bosstones)

A quick breakdown of what I'm writing:

Certain people will know how aspects of it are parts of me. That first part "Losing Your Mind And Benefiting From It All" is rather viewed as the first chapter and not a full story. I think I like how I can implement certain things that I've said and done or rather wish I would've said or done. I see my these series of short-stories as my second chance to make some errors and wasted moments turn into something I'd care to remember and enjoy reading and/or writing.

(Now Playing: "So Lonely" by The Hippos)

I don't know. I enjoy it. If anyone else enjoys it and digs it- I'll be psyched.

So far, I have parts of it written, with a possible 8 - 10 at finish.

Have a good evening/day/morning everyone.

- Josh

'losing your mind and benefiting from it all'

That nice title up above also shares the same title as my new short story.
It's something I spent a while working on the story itself.
It was fun, really.
It's also the reason I haven't really been posting on here.


Regardless, download it, tell me what you think :)

I'll probably have a mucho better version up soon though.


http://www.mediafire.com/?dhyxgzzudby